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2,900 & The Worst Ever Written

04 Nov

2900

As the number increases, my ideas for banners decreases. I just can’t seem to make pretty ones all the time! Gah! Anyways, I just wanna thank all 2,900 subscribers for your readership. It is exciting to see how my blog is growing and how people find it interesting. I’m really glad I get the chance to share my stories with you and hear your thoughts on them. Thank you so, so much!

Well since I’ve hit 2,900 subs, I’ve decided to do something rather embarrassing. Below you will find a story written by me. I was once a 13 year old who disliked reading and wanted to be a spy, so please don’t take the story seriously. I don’t write like this anymore… thankfully!

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HELP!

“Jamie, Chris, we need your help! Hipmo, his henchmen and ninjas are here. Quick he’s gonna get all of us.” The emergency XSA connecting-system went off on their watches.

Both of them quickly jumped into the emergency secret passage that led straight into the XSA (Xstream Special Agents) secret lab. When they got there the agency was empty. No one was there except the projector, screening Hipmo conveying a message saying, “You teens wont stand a chance to defeat me now. My new invention the ‘Mind Controller’ will allow me to control every single person’s mind in the entire world. And my first target is here – The XSA agency! So, if you want your fellow agents back or maybe thinking of saving the world from me, come fight me!” The message ended with an evil laughter.

Chris and Jamie went to the resource room to get some equipment. Meanwhile, Hipmo in his lab, ‘The Herrerasaurus’ was planning a trap to catch Chris and Jamie. “This is gonna be easy, they are just teenagers. One is 14 and the other is 16. What harm can they do?” Hipmo said to his second in command, Syniz. “Make sure the perimeters of Herrerasaurus is guarded by my henchmen!” Hipmo roared. “Yes boss,” Syniz cringed.

Back at XSA, Chris said to Jamie, “Why don’t we take all the stuff here?”

“Good idea,” Jamie replied.

Both of them took everything and headed towards the ‘Jet Booster’. They got into the ‘Jet Booster’ and said the password, Phoenix.

“Destination?” asked the computer.

“Herrerasaurus,” said Chris.

“It will take 5 hours from here, get ready for take of,” said the computer. Both of the agents did some preparation while the jet headed towards Herrerasaurus.

HERRERASAURUS

“We have reached your destination,” announced the computer.

“What?” said Chris rubbing his sleepy eyes.

“We are here,” replied Jamie.

The jet had landed on the ocean, but there was no sign of Herrerasaurus anywhere. Chris checked the computer and found out they were right on top of it!

Both of them slipped on the special water outfit which was taken from the resource room and checked if they have left anything behind in the jet. Then they dived into the water and there it is – Hipmo’s secret lab Herrerasaurus.

“It’s humongous!” exclaimed Jamie.

As they swam closer and closer towards Herrerasaurus they spotted a few of Hipmo’s henchmen.

“Do you think we can take them out?” asked Chris.

“I’m not sure, maybe it’s a trap, maybe there are more of hem hiding waiting for us to appear,” cautioned Jamie.

Chris replied, “Don’t be a pessimist.”

Without hesitation, he headed towards them before Jamie could utter another word.  Immediately the henchmen spotted Chris and shot him with ‘under water laser guns’. They tranquilized him and took him into the Herrerasaurus.

Jamie quickly followed the henchmen that had captured Chris through a hatch leading into Herrerasaurus. There were other henchmen on patrol keeping guard of the place. Jamie quickly removed the special water outfit and pressed the invisibility button on her inner suit. Having lost contact on Chris whereabouts, she quickly activated a button on her watch which immediately displayed a computerized map of Herrerasaurus. A fox icon appeared indicating Chris’ location, and the pursuit continued.

Jamie was following the icon on the map till it disappeared. Then she saw 5 ninjas guarding a metal steel electric door.

“According to the map there is no door here, maybe Chris is inside!” thinking aloud.

Then she carefully headed towards the door when her invisibility booster gone bust and she became visible again.

“Oh no! The energy for the invisibility booster must had short-circuited and burnt out. I should not have used it straight away after being in the water!” Jamie whined.

THE DOOR

Meanwhile behind the metal steel electric door, 2 henchmen grabbed Chris and shoved him on his knees before Hipmo.

“Where’s your partner?” demanded Hipmo.

“I don’t know,” Chris replied firmly.

“Where’s the girl,” Hipmo demanded again.

“If I knew I wouldn’t tell you either!” Chris bravely shouted back.

“Fine,” Hipmo said and snapped his fingers.

The 2 henchmen started punching Chris in the stomach. Hipmo snapped his fingers again and the henchmen stopped. Hipmo asked again, “I’m asking you for the last time, where is the girl!”

“I don’t know,” Chris cried out in pain. Hipmo gave a sign to his other henchmen and they went into the room and brought out a chip. Then Chris was strike on the head that left him unconscious.

Outside the door the ninjas charged towards Jamie. She started to shoot with her ‘Net Gun’. The ninjas were caught under the net and were helpless. Then she activated the flying mode on her watch and she levitated enabling her to give a swift flying kick on the other ninjas. Just as the ninjas were trying to gain footing, she threw ‘sleeping darts’ at them causing them to fall into deep sleep.

Taking a second look at the map, the fox icon is moving. “Maybe its Chris, or maybe it’s a trap,” Jamie thought. Then she started following it that ultimately led to the dungeon. She went in and to her surprise there wasn’t anybody there, not a single agent. Suddenly all the agents and Chris appeared behind the trap wall. But they looked lifeless. They were hypnotized. Then appeared Hipmo tailed by his ninjas and henchmen. “Give up, you can never defeat me now!”

“Dream on, I will never give up,” called out Jamie boldly.

“Get herrrr!!!” commanded Hipmo.

Jamie dashed towards the exit, opened the hatch, took a deep breath and dived in. She swam up to the surface and aimed for the jet. Failing to get the engine running, she gingerly fastened her boots on to a flying skateboard and took off into the air. But the enemies were not far from sight.

“I need a plan, a plan, quick!” instructing herself.

CONTROL STATION

Still under hot pursuit, a quick search of the Herrerasaurus map for the control station should be the next move. However, the search was futile.

“Maybe the control station is in the metal steel electric door, the door is not in the map and so is the control station, that’s it! The control station is behind that door!” Jamie said coolly, “Now the only thing I need now is…a…decoy! Yes a decoy.”

Jamie managed to glide towards a big rock to hide, unnoticed, the enemies lost her trail. To divert the enemies, she created a hologram of herself. She succeeded and gave her a chance to sneak back to Herrerasaurus.

Back into the water, she noticed there were still a few ninjas and henchmen guarding the entrance. She took out the under water torch and shone it with maximum power, causing a blinding effect to the henchmen and ninjas. Jamie hurriedly made her way to the entrance.

When she got in she ran towards the door and with her ‘laser pen’ she look for the connection that allows the door to have electric current in it. It was at the top of the door and Jamie used the laser pen and cut the wire. In order to get in, she cut the door with the ‘acid highlighter’ in a circular motion.

Once in, with no one in sight, she made her way to the control panel and tried to figure out a way to stop Hipmo’s mind controller from controlling all the agents till she heard a familiar voice.

“Surrender now”

“Chris?” Jamie asked.

Chris was standing there like a zombie gazing at Jamie.

“What’s got into you! Snap out of it, don’t you see? Hipmo’s controlling you! Oh yeah, I don’t think you get it, cause you are in his control,” sighed Jamie.

Chris remained motionless. Then Jamie spotted a chip implanted on his left temple and she reached out to it but Chris grabbed her hand and pushed her away. Jamie thought for a moment, “That’s it! That’s the mind controller, if I can just take that thing off them they can’t be controlled anymore! Or maybe if I press STOP MIND CONTROLLING button, then maybe this problem will be solved a little easier”

MISSION ACCOMPLISHED

Just as Jamie was about to reach out to press the STOP MIND CONTROLLING button, Chris pulled her from the back and slammed her against the wall. Hipmo followed by Syniz dashed in.

“Not bad for a teenage girl but not smart enough,” remarked Hipmo cynically. “Syniz call for back-ups!”

Jamie reached for the ‘dizzy pins’ at the back of her pocket and aimed at Hipmo and Syniz on the head. Bulls eye – both fell to the ground wiggling in pain. Meantime, Chris is still standing there motionless waiting for his next command. Jamie ran across to the control panel and said the password, when she heard heavy stomping of feet behind her, without wasting time she pressed the STOP MIND CONTROLLING button.

Immediately the stomping came to a halt. As though getting up from a deep sleep, Chris murmured, “What happened?”

“Long story” Jamie replied.

Agent Osprey, Head of XSA, and the other agents begin to regain consciousness and managed to overpower the ninjas and henchmen before they can escape.

“All thanks to Agent Jamie and Agent Chris who saved not only the agency but the world, Good job! It is an honor to have agents who are brave, trustworthy, reliable and diligent. I, Head of the XSA hereby promote them to Level 5!” Agent Osprey ended his speech with resounding applause from the floor.

What’s our next assignment, boss?” Jamie and Chris asked with eagerness.

 THE END

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I apologize… for the agony you’ve been through.

This is actually my very first short story. Back then, it felt like I was writing a novel! But when I dug it up, I realized how short it was and laughed. Well being 13, 1,600 words was actually a lot; at that age in high school, we only wrote 150 words for essays.

Typically doing a re-read, I couldn’t help but laugh as I went along. Not only do I name everything with cheesiness, my characters are also so fond of talking about their situation! At least I don’t do that now.

Anyways, if you’re wondering why I shared this horrible story with you, there is a reason. This is clearly the worst thing I’ve written but it proves that one can improve over time. You may not be the best storyteller now, but with passion, perseverance and time, you can be one. Don’t give up so quickly, and give yourself a few chances to polish up and shine.

I hope you guys had a good laugh reading this and as always, let me know what you think in the comments below!

© 2003-2013 Jeyna Grace

(To read much better stories, visit here.)

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9 Comments

Posted by on November 4, 2013 in Original Works

 

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9 responses to “2,900 & The Worst Ever Written

  1. pitchscript

    November 4, 2013 at 9:22 am

    You have just became the best writer in Hollywood. Really. It was actually pretty good. And I have just found your blog and it’s good. Real good. Oh shit, the ninjas are here gotta go!

     
    • Jeyna Grace

      November 4, 2013 at 9:25 am

      Hahaha! I’m sure Hollywood could do better than that 🙂 Thank you, I’m glad you like it. I hope the ninjas don’t get you 🙂

       
      • pitchscript

        November 4, 2013 at 9:30 am

        They already have… luckily I have the laser pen with me and cut all of their arms off. Honestly, great blog. Love what you do! And I’m keeping the laser pen!

         
        • Jeyna Grace

          November 4, 2013 at 9:31 am

          Haha! Laser pens are very handy indeed 😀 Thanks, I really appreciate that!

           
  2. b00kreader

    November 7, 2013 at 1:10 pm

    Hey Jenya I really enjoy your blog so I nominated you for the Sunshine Award! For directions on how to accept the award follow this link, https://b00kreader.wordpress.com/2013/11/06/sunshine-award-nomination/

     
    • Jeyna Grace

      November 9, 2013 at 6:29 pm

      Thank you! I really appreciate the nomination 😀

       
      • b00kreader

        November 9, 2013 at 10:59 pm

        Your welcome, it is well deserved!

         
  3. abbles

    November 18, 2013 at 11:08 am

    Haha yes little Jeyna! “STOP MIND CONTROLLING button” 🙂

     
    • Jeyna Grace

      November 18, 2013 at 11:22 am

      Haha, it couldn’t have been more obvious!

       

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